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I know that most (all?) families have funny stories about how their kids have misspoken words. I like these stories. And I like it when my kids do this. Not only is it cute and funny, but it shows that they are experimenting with language. Any time a kid talks in a new way, he’s taking a risk and we should encourage them if they say something not quite right, even as we are correcting them.

But I, for reasons that I can’t explain, except with the statement, “I am goofy”, have incorporated my kids wrongly pronounced words into my own speech.

For example, Anna, who has heard us say, “Nuts” and “Oh, my” as expression of frustration and surprise, has changed these to “Nut!” and “Oh, mine.” Can I just say, as a casual non-offensive anti-curse word, ‘Nut’ works better than ‘Nuts’

And instead of ‘Quickly’, my daughter Adelyn, when she was younger, said “fickly”

And Barrett, instead of “Sure”, said “Shua”

And Carl, when there were only two kids in our family, would say to his younger brother, “Mon” for “Come on”.

And Adelyn said “Boes” instead of “Boys”

I now use all of these words in my language as I speak to my family.

So, it wouldn’t be unlikely, if my wife were to say, “Honey, could you bring the older three to the library, but please hurry, it closes in less than an hour,” I might respond thusly.

“Shua. Boes! Mon, fickly!”

 Can you translate?

If we invite you to our home and you take us up on it, I just want to point out a couple things.

You may think, for example, that since our garbage cans are empty, that we just emptied them out right before you came, in order to, I don’t know, make our bathroom (or whatever room) look more tidy or something. No, this is not the case. We happen to have a family of 9 people who don’t create any garbage. We’re just weird that way.

Or you might notice that our carpeting has slight stripes in the way the threads are lying and conclude that we just vacuumed that afternoon. But no, that’s merely the way the manufacturer made them. We ordered them pre-striped.

Or you might be surprised that a family with seven kids doesn’t have toys out and scattered around the house. Well, I can understand your astonishment, because I could see how that could happen. But our kids have just learned to clean up their toys and artwork and books right after they use them, um, every . . . every single time, so it’s been months, no . . . years since I’ve seen any kid messes. We just naturally have a clutter free home. Really, it took no effort on our part.

I see that you’ve noticed the lack of dirt or grime in the kitchen. Yes, isn’t that something? No, we didn’t just clean and scrub the sink and stove up in hurried fashion right as you were on your way over. We just never spill. Anything. No, not scrambled eggs. No, not pancake syrup. It’s like an oddity of nature. A miracle, if you will.

But if, however, you happen to come over unannounced (and we hope you will), and find that some or all of these things aren’t true, that there are messy corners or even whole rooms of our home, then this is what happened: We have probably just been entertaining another family, one that isn’t so supernaturally mess-free. And we probably aren’t mentioning this to you, because we don’t want to bring shame on them.

It’s not necessarily a sin to create messes, after all.

1. What’s with the name?

I decided to go with “Responsible Father” for these reasons:

A. This is blog for and about Dads.

B. I like how its title makes a nice companion to my other blog. Maybe someday I’ll host a whole *suite of “Responsible” blogs.

C. I like that there are more than one meaning for “Responsible”. Here are two that are pertinent:
a. Able to make moral or rational decisions on one’s own and therefore answerable for one’s behavior.
b. Liable to be required to give account, as of one’s actions or of the discharge of a duty or trust.

Thus, while only “good” fathers are (more or less) responsible in the first sense, all fathers are or will be responsible in the second.

D. More to the point, I like what Pastor Piper had to say about this.

When Adam and Eve sinned in the garden and God came to call them to account, it didn’t matter that Eve had sinned first. God said, “Adam, where are you?” (Genesis 3:9). That’s God’s word to the family today: Adam, husband, father, where are you? If something is not working right at your house and Jesus comes knocking on the door, he may have an issue with your wife, but the first thing he’s going to say when she opens the door is, “Is the man of the house home?”

So I hope this blog helps men (including myself) become more responsible, and serves to remind them that they will be held responsible sooner or later.

2. Do you consider yourself to be a Responsible Father (in the first sense)?

I’d consider myself to be better than average, which is not good enough. I pray daily for more wisdom, grace, peace, calmness. The next time you talk to me ask me about the last time I failed as a Father and I bet I’ll be able to tell you something recent.

* Don’t count on it.